Friday, June 26, 2009

Bittersweet Joy


I'm glad you've chosen to come along with me to the next room I'm about to enter here at the castle. This room brings bittersweet Joy to me. Before we venture inside I need to linger at the door for a moment or two, while I pause, think and reflect on what we are about to view.

OK, I believe I'm ready now and soon you may understand why I needed to pause before entering this room of Joy. It was only 1 year ago on July 4,2008 that I entered this bittersweet room of Joy when I bid my mom goodbye from this earthly world.


You may be asking how could that possibly bring Joy? The bittersweet part still remains with my longing to hug and hold her again and say "I love you" face to face. The Joy is in knowing that I will one day be united with her again because she was saved by accepting Jesus into her heart as I too have done. Knowing this brings Joy even now as the tears trickle from my eyes.

I will probably revisit this room once in a while; however, as I've mentioned before, there are many more rooms in this old castle to explore. So for now I close the door on this bittersweet room of Joy..........................
Pam Fidler

Wednesday, June 17, 2009

The Castle


My life has seemed like a castle with so many rooms to explore. The room of Gladness where joy and hope abound. The room of self-doubt where fears and lack of self esteem reside.

Then I go a little further down the corridor and chance upon a room I very seldom visit. The room of regret and remorse. At first glance I can see a cobweb of delight lingering in the corner saying, "OH WOW, she's come back to pick us up again."

But then I am reminded why I don't come here much anymore so I quickly close the door and amble on my way, for this castle holds so many more rooms to be unlocked and perhaps memories to unfold.

So on it is I go, but oh, alas, what do I behold? Oh yes, it's a mirror afixed upon the door to my next room to explore. I see a foggy haze, perhaps a cloud of gloom and despair awaits inside this room. But to my great amazement and with much delight and joy as I finally find the courage to look within, it is the Lord in this room, abolishing me of all sin and guilt, doubt and despair. It is in this room I long to linger.

And yet Christ says to me "Now that you are walking with me and I with you, there are many more rooms in this castle for you to explore. Ones of Hope, Love, Faith and more and more and more."

So on I go to see what else My Lord has in store for me while in this dwelling place I explore...............Pam Fidler